#320
Clint 0:03
Hey everybody, welcome to the wedding ceremony podcast. We talked about anything and everything that has to do with wedding ceremonies. This is episode number 320, recorded on Tuesday, June the 22nd 2021. That's a lot of 20s. My name is Clint Hufft. And with me is a gentleman that I don't know if he planned all the 20s or if they just happened accidentally, the one and only JP Reynolds.
JP Reynolds 0:28
I'm not telling.
Clint 0:30
No. It's diabolical. JP, that's all there is to it. Yeah. JP is an accomplished author. His books are in the Amazon store and in the Kindle store in Amazon. He is a communications expert. thebusinessofconfidence.com is that website, his wedding website is JPRweddings.com. Mine is ReverendClint.com or ClintHufft.com, for all of the things that I do. JP, I know that you have stories to tell. And I'm just gonna step to the side and let you take the mic.
JP Reynolds 1:07
Well, I've been making my way through the backlog of weddings from last year. Right. And so I've had a few ceremonies in the last couple of weeks. And I've got like a little platter of goodies to share from the very sweet to the very profound and my instinct would be to begin with the profound.
I'll admit, I'm too lazy. To start with the more silly, but I'm actually going to begin not with a silly story, but something that caught me by surprise. A couple of weeks ago, I did a wedding. The venue that you have officiated at. It's a place called Hummingbird ranch. And it's outside of LA. It’s kind of situated nestled at the foot of not necessarily mountains, but very hilly terrain. It's an isolated venue. It's a venue that has had some very interesting owners, from the beginning on up to the present. And it's very expansive, and secluded venue. And as I think we all know, oftentimes before a ceremony, either DJ will be playing some music, or the strings will be stringing, or the harp will be harping. And most of the time when this music is being played, it's helping to set the tone and they allow people to settle into the moment. Most people though, are simply chattering away and the music becomes really background music.
This couple though, for their music for the ceremony had just one violinist, and he played an electric violin. And so first of all, incredibly, phenomenally Talented. I went to his website, they see that he had awards and has appeared on reality shows, etc, etc. But what he did and, I don't think I've ever seen before. For the half hour before the start of the ceremony, he stood center on the platform where the couple and I we're going to stand. And he actually, in a sense, gave a performance to all of the guests as they were taking their seats and waiting for the ceremony to start. And so it wasn't background music, it was literally center stage, and against the majestic background of the ranch in the hills. I thought I was watching like one of these shows that PBS broadcast during its fundraising events. It was electrifying. Absolutely just stupendous.
Clint 5:06
Did he play with pre recorded background stuff? Because I've seen some musicians do that. And it really is amazing.
JP Reynolds 5:14
He did but what added to it was the fact that he was standing center stage. But he wasn't off to the side. And that it really became a performance.
Clint 5:30
He was your warm up act.
JP Reynolds 5:32
And he was. I said that to him, actually. And it changed the atmosphere. And I was taken aback, I was surprised like, well, this is different. And this is not to say one is better than the other, simply to say, Well, this is another way to welcome people to your celebration, and that it really is a pronounced kickoff to your celebration and a pronounced prelude to the ceremony. And then, what I love, love, love love. The cocktail hour was in another section of Ranch House. And he led the guests to the cocktail hour.
Clint 6:37
Oh, like a Pied Piper type of deal.
JP Reynolds 6:41
Pied violinist.
Clint 6:43
Yes, indeed.
JP Reynolds 6:46
And that generated just, again, a fun energy.
Clint 6:57
That sounds so cool.
JP Reynolds 7:00
It was it was just so dramatic. It really was very cool. And I've never had that kind of sense of a musician being the, quote, opening act.
Clint 7:18
How was he to work with with you in terms of the cues and all that stuff?
JP Reynolds 7:23
Well, the only cue that I give a musician is to cue for the end of the ceremony. Because at the beginning of the ceremony, everything he coordinates with the event planner, so it was fine. Yeah.
Clint 7:39
Well, the only reason I bring that up is that what I found is that if there's anything during the ceremony that requires any kind of background music, that kind of stuff. Sometimes the couples want me to ask who presents this woman. And sometimes they don't. If I'm not gonna ask that question. I like the music to keep playing until the couple actually gets in front of me. And everybody sits down. I like to fill that with music. If I'm going to ask the question, then obviously, the couple or whoever's being escorted is going to stop, even with the first row of chairs. And whoever's playing the music needs to know one or the other. Just to kind of set that up. So I was just curious about, I don't know, just interacting with a personality like that. Because I mean, the way you've described it, he's used to being the show, the star.
JP Reynolds 8:36
Then he met me.
Clint 8:38
He realized there is a hierarchy. Thank you very much.
JP Reynolds 8:46
Oh, no, he was an utter gem and we actually talked about, I was asking the who presents question. And so he knew how to bring the live music to an appropriate conclusion once they reach the first row.
Clint 9:09
That's cool. Yeah, that's really cool. I've worked with two different electric violinists. And it's just, I mean, I'm sorry to say, for this play on words, but it is electrifying. It really is. To have that kind of sound. And, most of the time, I mean, well, both of those times. They were real performers. Because sometimes you'll have like a quartet or whatever. They're used to playing in an ensemble. They're used to being kind of amongst the orchestra, but an electric violinist. That's a different mentality to that. I mean, that's the way it feels to me.
JP Reynolds 9:50
So, then, I did periodically think of you during the last two weekends. And then kind of shook my head. But leave me alone. But you know the last podcast we talked about tapping into the energy of pre ceremony energy of the groom and the bride and vested persons, etc, etc. And I hear people, it's a very important point. And I was reminded of that a number of times in the last couple of weeks.
I did a wedding on Friday, small wedding, very sweet wedding in that this couple knew each other when they were younger. They really were supposed to get married when they were younger, something happened, I don't know, they didn't get married. They married other people, they had children, life went on. And now, As the World Turns here, they are finally getting married. And there was a real sweetness and poignancy to it all.
Small guest count, no event planner, no day-of coordinator. At a nice venue that did not require an outside vendor. But it's tough when you're relying upon a relative to do that last minute coordination or whatever.
And the groom saunters down and we had only met once on zoom, and because they hired me late in the process. And I said to him, Now listen, I said, You have nothing to worry about. I've got your back, I’m your anchor, I'm going to guide you through everything. Just hold hands, look at each other. And enjoy the moment. He looked at me, he smiled, and he said to me, thank you. He said. I'm not nervous. Just friends and family. And they all love us. So what could go wrong?
Clint 12:25
Oh, man.
JP Reynolds 12:31
I love that. I want to give that man a hug and a kiss. Or at least a hug.
Clint 12:37
You know, I had two feelings all at the same time. One was, oh my gosh, that's awesome. That's like the perfect groom to have that attitude and feel that way about all your friends and family. But then he said, what could go wrong? And then I thought, Man, that's a can of worms. You went open that?
JP Reynolds 12:58
Well, did you see for him? It was what could go wrong? In the sense of things could go wrong, but it doesn't matter because we're friends and family.
Clint 13:10
Right. Right. Right.
JP Reynolds 13:14
Now, in that sense, and I as the fates would have it. He did tempt the fates. And so they were having a Sand Ceremony. Now, after 300 plus episodes, I'm going to make a confession I don't think I've made before and I realize I have been co-podding with the granddaddy of the sand ritual. But I am not a big fan of the sand unity ritual. No I'm not. I'm not into sand that much.
Okay, I mean, I’m happy to do sand and I play a game with myself. When I meet with a couple within the first three minutes. I try to guess if they're the sand people or not. Like I met with a couple on zoom yesterday and I looked at her and you're not sand people. And then sure enough when it came up in the conversation about a unity ritual, right. So yeah, neither one sand. I said I knew that. I can just tell sand people.
This couple wanted the sand ritual and it was wonderful. I liked the sand ritual if there are children involved. I like it when there's the children. I think it's a great unity ritual when you have children. So they each had two. She had two boys, he had two daughters. And, man, when you don't have a coordinator, helping you get all this material and everything, It's exhausting. and so she had Last minute rush, put it all together.
And so they go over to the table and I introduce it and the venue is adjacent to a yacht club. And just as they were about to pour the sand a boat starts to very slowly float by, and they are blaring, like some hip hop song, hip hop, rap, whatever it might be. That is the last piece of music you want playing at a wedding. And as the music starts to blare, the kids just burst into laughter. And the couple starts laughing and all the guests start laughing. And I have to say it was the the most joyful sand unity ritual that they've ever witnessed.
Clint 16:07
I'm imagining what you've described, and the spontaneity of these people that I don't even know if they were even aware there was a wedding going on, if they did it on purpose, or whatever. But the way it played out, do you mind, there's a story I have similar to that.
We're doing a ceremony at the beach. And, right at the very beginning, oh, and this particular place, we're in the sand, but there's an access road in front of the restaurant. So you have to walk outside the restaurant and then go across the street, get to the sand where the ceremony is going to be. So that's open to the public, anybody can drive by. And right as I'm beginning to do the opening remarks, I take a breath and at that very second, there's a pickup truck with a bunch of guys in the back. And one of them yells out really loudly, very clearly, “Don’t do it!”, When he saw that there was a wedding, right? And the couple immediately just started laughing really hard. And it was just, it was one of those things where if I describe it to you, without telling you what the response was, you could be horrified like, Oh my gosh, that must have broken their heart. So how terrible. In fact, it was the opposite. The same way that you're describing it, it was the exact opposite. It turned out to be really funny. It ended up being on America's Funniest Home Videos. For the Valentine show. It was just it was perfect.
JP Reynolds 17:28
Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes I think when unity rituals are incorporated, that we can overthink, unity rituals, we can overthink our explanation of what this ritual is about, and overthink and overstate the symbolism, etc, etc. And what I loved about this moment was here is what the sand ceremony represents: six people who are family, loving each other and being silly together. There's the ritual. Yes. Beautiful. Beautiful. Yep. Celebrating the love and the silliness. of family. I thought it was as sweet as sweet could be.
Clint 18:36
That's, that's awesome. I love that. Well done.
JP Reynolds 18:40
I did though, All right. Thank you, Jesus. So I go up to the groom. And we shake hands. And he he's got a very firm handshake. And he pulls me into himself, like pulls me in to his chest. And he leans in, and he whispers into my ear, “Thank you, JP”. It was like, this very intimate moment. And it was like, thinking, Now I know why she married you. Oh. Because I'm such a weird person is whispering in my ear? Because I said, Oh, I wonder, Have you ever had a groom whispering to your ear?
Clint 19:56
No, I have not. I would think I would remember that.
JP Reynolds 20:00
Cuz I thought to myself I wonder if Clint’s ever had this moment? Because I never had a groom like whisper into my ear because normally they shake hands and say thank you, JP, but this was like, pulls me into it. And like then leans him like, heavily.
Clint 20:18
I've had couples whispered to me things to me during the ceremony.
JP Reynolds 20:26
Yeah, no, this is different state. Yeah, that's like a question there. I'm whispering or a fear or whatever. I have other tidbits, but I think we're I have no sense of time. I know we are.
Clint 20:45
Actually your instincts are right, we are about out of time. But that's cool. Because you've teased it now. I'm excited about the next episode. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, JP. I like it when there's something. The real challenge is whether or not you or I will remember next episode. What will we talk about?
Yeah, hey, listen, everybody. That's the way this works at the wedding ceremony podcast. And you can be involved if you want to. We want to thank everybody that has been reaching out to us by our email address. And the way you can do that is you go to weddingceremonypodcast.com and click on the Email button, it comes right to it. I check it every single day. You can offer us a story, you can make a suggestion or ask us a question. Whatever you want to do. It's all good. That also is where you can listen to our episodes. They're archived chronologically, the most recent one is always at the top. We've added transcripts for the most recent episodes. And you also if you want to can look up the wedding ceremony podcast in the Apple Store. And then you can subscribe, which would be great because every time we post a new episode, it'll automatically come into your world. That also is where if you want to you can leave us a review, because that's how people find new content. And there's a lot of people out there in the wedding world that I think would have a lot of fun listening to the wedding ceremony podcast. We want to thank the incredible musicians that play our theme music the dacapoplayers.com. Remember that JP'S books are in the Amazon store and in the Kindle store in Amazon. For communications coaching His website is thebusinessofconfidence.com. His wedding website is jprweddings.Com. Mine is ReverendClint.com or ClintHufft.com for all of the things that I do. That's it for this episode of the wedding ceremony podcast. This is Clint and on behalf of JP We will see you next time.
Clint 0:03
Hey everybody, welcome to the wedding ceremony podcast. We talked about anything and everything that has to do with wedding ceremonies. This is episode number 320, recorded on Tuesday, June the 22nd 2021. That's a lot of 20s. My name is Clint Hufft. And with me is a gentleman that I don't know if he planned all the 20s or if they just happened accidentally, the one and only JP Reynolds.
JP Reynolds 0:28
I'm not telling.
Clint 0:30
No. It's diabolical. JP, that's all there is to it. Yeah. JP is an accomplished author. His books are in the Amazon store and in the Kindle store in Amazon. He is a communications expert. thebusinessofconfidence.com is that website, his wedding website is JPRweddings.com. Mine is ReverendClint.com or ClintHufft.com, for all of the things that I do. JP, I know that you have stories to tell. And I'm just gonna step to the side and let you take the mic.
JP Reynolds 1:07
Well, I've been making my way through the backlog of weddings from last year. Right. And so I've had a few ceremonies in the last couple of weeks. And I've got like a little platter of goodies to share from the very sweet to the very profound and my instinct would be to begin with the profound.
I'll admit, I'm too lazy. To start with the more silly, but I'm actually going to begin not with a silly story, but something that caught me by surprise. A couple of weeks ago, I did a wedding. The venue that you have officiated at. It's a place called Hummingbird ranch. And it's outside of LA. It’s kind of situated nestled at the foot of not necessarily mountains, but very hilly terrain. It's an isolated venue. It's a venue that has had some very interesting owners, from the beginning on up to the present. And it's very expansive, and secluded venue. And as I think we all know, oftentimes before a ceremony, either DJ will be playing some music, or the strings will be stringing, or the harp will be harping. And most of the time when this music is being played, it's helping to set the tone and they allow people to settle into the moment. Most people though, are simply chattering away and the music becomes really background music.
This couple though, for their music for the ceremony had just one violinist, and he played an electric violin. And so first of all, incredibly, phenomenally Talented. I went to his website, they see that he had awards and has appeared on reality shows, etc, etc. But what he did and, I don't think I've ever seen before. For the half hour before the start of the ceremony, he stood center on the platform where the couple and I we're going to stand. And he actually, in a sense, gave a performance to all of the guests as they were taking their seats and waiting for the ceremony to start. And so it wasn't background music, it was literally center stage, and against the majestic background of the ranch in the hills. I thought I was watching like one of these shows that PBS broadcast during its fundraising events. It was electrifying. Absolutely just stupendous.
Clint 5:06
Did he play with pre recorded background stuff? Because I've seen some musicians do that. And it really is amazing.
JP Reynolds 5:14
He did but what added to it was the fact that he was standing center stage. But he wasn't off to the side. And that it really became a performance.
Clint 5:30
He was your warm up act.
JP Reynolds 5:32
And he was. I said that to him, actually. And it changed the atmosphere. And I was taken aback, I was surprised like, well, this is different. And this is not to say one is better than the other, simply to say, Well, this is another way to welcome people to your celebration, and that it really is a pronounced kickoff to your celebration and a pronounced prelude to the ceremony. And then, what I love, love, love love. The cocktail hour was in another section of Ranch House. And he led the guests to the cocktail hour.
Clint 6:37
Oh, like a Pied Piper type of deal.
JP Reynolds 6:41
Pied violinist.
Clint 6:43
Yes, indeed.
JP Reynolds 6:46
And that generated just, again, a fun energy.
Clint 6:57
That sounds so cool.
JP Reynolds 7:00
It was it was just so dramatic. It really was very cool. And I've never had that kind of sense of a musician being the, quote, opening act.
Clint 7:18
How was he to work with with you in terms of the cues and all that stuff?
JP Reynolds 7:23
Well, the only cue that I give a musician is to cue for the end of the ceremony. Because at the beginning of the ceremony, everything he coordinates with the event planner, so it was fine. Yeah.
Clint 7:39
Well, the only reason I bring that up is that what I found is that if there's anything during the ceremony that requires any kind of background music, that kind of stuff. Sometimes the couples want me to ask who presents this woman. And sometimes they don't. If I'm not gonna ask that question. I like the music to keep playing until the couple actually gets in front of me. And everybody sits down. I like to fill that with music. If I'm going to ask the question, then obviously, the couple or whoever's being escorted is going to stop, even with the first row of chairs. And whoever's playing the music needs to know one or the other. Just to kind of set that up. So I was just curious about, I don't know, just interacting with a personality like that. Because I mean, the way you've described it, he's used to being the show, the star.
JP Reynolds 8:36
Then he met me.
Clint 8:38
He realized there is a hierarchy. Thank you very much.
JP Reynolds 8:46
Oh, no, he was an utter gem and we actually talked about, I was asking the who presents question. And so he knew how to bring the live music to an appropriate conclusion once they reach the first row.
Clint 9:09
That's cool. Yeah, that's really cool. I've worked with two different electric violinists. And it's just, I mean, I'm sorry to say, for this play on words, but it is electrifying. It really is. To have that kind of sound. And, most of the time, I mean, well, both of those times. They were real performers. Because sometimes you'll have like a quartet or whatever. They're used to playing in an ensemble. They're used to being kind of amongst the orchestra, but an electric violinist. That's a different mentality to that. I mean, that's the way it feels to me.
JP Reynolds 9:50
So, then, I did periodically think of you during the last two weekends. And then kind of shook my head. But leave me alone. But you know the last podcast we talked about tapping into the energy of pre ceremony energy of the groom and the bride and vested persons, etc, etc. And I hear people, it's a very important point. And I was reminded of that a number of times in the last couple of weeks.
I did a wedding on Friday, small wedding, very sweet wedding in that this couple knew each other when they were younger. They really were supposed to get married when they were younger, something happened, I don't know, they didn't get married. They married other people, they had children, life went on. And now, As the World Turns here, they are finally getting married. And there was a real sweetness and poignancy to it all.
Small guest count, no event planner, no day-of coordinator. At a nice venue that did not require an outside vendor. But it's tough when you're relying upon a relative to do that last minute coordination or whatever.
And the groom saunters down and we had only met once on zoom, and because they hired me late in the process. And I said to him, Now listen, I said, You have nothing to worry about. I've got your back, I’m your anchor, I'm going to guide you through everything. Just hold hands, look at each other. And enjoy the moment. He looked at me, he smiled, and he said to me, thank you. He said. I'm not nervous. Just friends and family. And they all love us. So what could go wrong?
Clint 12:25
Oh, man.
JP Reynolds 12:31
I love that. I want to give that man a hug and a kiss. Or at least a hug.
Clint 12:37
You know, I had two feelings all at the same time. One was, oh my gosh, that's awesome. That's like the perfect groom to have that attitude and feel that way about all your friends and family. But then he said, what could go wrong? And then I thought, Man, that's a can of worms. You went open that?
JP Reynolds 12:58
Well, did you see for him? It was what could go wrong? In the sense of things could go wrong, but it doesn't matter because we're friends and family.
Clint 13:10
Right. Right. Right.
JP Reynolds 13:14
Now, in that sense, and I as the fates would have it. He did tempt the fates. And so they were having a Sand Ceremony. Now, after 300 plus episodes, I'm going to make a confession I don't think I've made before and I realize I have been co-podding with the granddaddy of the sand ritual. But I am not a big fan of the sand unity ritual. No I'm not. I'm not into sand that much.
Okay, I mean, I’m happy to do sand and I play a game with myself. When I meet with a couple within the first three minutes. I try to guess if they're the sand people or not. Like I met with a couple on zoom yesterday and I looked at her and you're not sand people. And then sure enough when it came up in the conversation about a unity ritual, right. So yeah, neither one sand. I said I knew that. I can just tell sand people.
This couple wanted the sand ritual and it was wonderful. I liked the sand ritual if there are children involved. I like it when there's the children. I think it's a great unity ritual when you have children. So they each had two. She had two boys, he had two daughters. And, man, when you don't have a coordinator, helping you get all this material and everything, It's exhausting. and so she had Last minute rush, put it all together.
And so they go over to the table and I introduce it and the venue is adjacent to a yacht club. And just as they were about to pour the sand a boat starts to very slowly float by, and they are blaring, like some hip hop song, hip hop, rap, whatever it might be. That is the last piece of music you want playing at a wedding. And as the music starts to blare, the kids just burst into laughter. And the couple starts laughing and all the guests start laughing. And I have to say it was the the most joyful sand unity ritual that they've ever witnessed.
Clint 16:07
I'm imagining what you've described, and the spontaneity of these people that I don't even know if they were even aware there was a wedding going on, if they did it on purpose, or whatever. But the way it played out, do you mind, there's a story I have similar to that.
We're doing a ceremony at the beach. And, right at the very beginning, oh, and this particular place, we're in the sand, but there's an access road in front of the restaurant. So you have to walk outside the restaurant and then go across the street, get to the sand where the ceremony is going to be. So that's open to the public, anybody can drive by. And right as I'm beginning to do the opening remarks, I take a breath and at that very second, there's a pickup truck with a bunch of guys in the back. And one of them yells out really loudly, very clearly, “Don’t do it!”, When he saw that there was a wedding, right? And the couple immediately just started laughing really hard. And it was just, it was one of those things where if I describe it to you, without telling you what the response was, you could be horrified like, Oh my gosh, that must have broken their heart. So how terrible. In fact, it was the opposite. The same way that you're describing it, it was the exact opposite. It turned out to be really funny. It ended up being on America's Funniest Home Videos. For the Valentine show. It was just it was perfect.
JP Reynolds 17:28
Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes I think when unity rituals are incorporated, that we can overthink, unity rituals, we can overthink our explanation of what this ritual is about, and overthink and overstate the symbolism, etc, etc. And what I loved about this moment was here is what the sand ceremony represents: six people who are family, loving each other and being silly together. There's the ritual. Yes. Beautiful. Beautiful. Yep. Celebrating the love and the silliness. of family. I thought it was as sweet as sweet could be.
Clint 18:36
That's, that's awesome. I love that. Well done.
JP Reynolds 18:40
I did though, All right. Thank you, Jesus. So I go up to the groom. And we shake hands. And he he's got a very firm handshake. And he pulls me into himself, like pulls me in to his chest. And he leans in, and he whispers into my ear, “Thank you, JP”. It was like, this very intimate moment. And it was like, thinking, Now I know why she married you. Oh. Because I'm such a weird person is whispering in my ear? Because I said, Oh, I wonder, Have you ever had a groom whispering to your ear?
Clint 19:56
No, I have not. I would think I would remember that.
JP Reynolds 20:00
Cuz I thought to myself I wonder if Clint’s ever had this moment? Because I never had a groom like whisper into my ear because normally they shake hands and say thank you, JP, but this was like, pulls me into it. And like then leans him like, heavily.
Clint 20:18
I've had couples whispered to me things to me during the ceremony.
JP Reynolds 20:26
Yeah, no, this is different state. Yeah, that's like a question there. I'm whispering or a fear or whatever. I have other tidbits, but I think we're I have no sense of time. I know we are.
Clint 20:45
Actually your instincts are right, we are about out of time. But that's cool. Because you've teased it now. I'm excited about the next episode. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, JP. I like it when there's something. The real challenge is whether or not you or I will remember next episode. What will we talk about?
Yeah, hey, listen, everybody. That's the way this works at the wedding ceremony podcast. And you can be involved if you want to. We want to thank everybody that has been reaching out to us by our email address. And the way you can do that is you go to weddingceremonypodcast.com and click on the Email button, it comes right to it. I check it every single day. You can offer us a story, you can make a suggestion or ask us a question. Whatever you want to do. It's all good. That also is where you can listen to our episodes. They're archived chronologically, the most recent one is always at the top. We've added transcripts for the most recent episodes. And you also if you want to can look up the wedding ceremony podcast in the Apple Store. And then you can subscribe, which would be great because every time we post a new episode, it'll automatically come into your world. That also is where if you want to you can leave us a review, because that's how people find new content. And there's a lot of people out there in the wedding world that I think would have a lot of fun listening to the wedding ceremony podcast. We want to thank the incredible musicians that play our theme music the dacapoplayers.com. Remember that JP'S books are in the Amazon store and in the Kindle store in Amazon. For communications coaching His website is thebusinessofconfidence.com. His wedding website is jprweddings.Com. Mine is ReverendClint.com or ClintHufft.com for all of the things that I do. That's it for this episode of the wedding ceremony podcast. This is Clint and on behalf of JP We will see you next time.